journey's don't stop believin''

watched it, and it was greatttt. hand's down.

tired.

of everything. I just want to catch my breath and release all this tension ans sighs I have, and learn how to accept it and have fun doing what I'm doing. Don't get me wrong, I love myself right now, and what's happening, but I'm overwhelm. I'm overwhelm by how I'm so into what I'm doing. and I'm not use to it. There's part of my heart that keeps bothering me. It's annoying and so unnecessary. I just want to slumb and just sit where I could think for things that coulda happened, and things that I want to happen. I want to make stories in my head. I want to do something, but I can't express it, for some reason. sighh...

There is this one song that I kept repeating over and over. David archuleta "crush" I just love it. so much that I keep singing it over and over in my head even when I'm taking my test. just too good.

Ms.independent

So last week, I bumped into a friend of mine. We kinda caught up on what's new in our life... then we kinda went to a topic about "filipina" girls. He said, "ALL FILIPINA GIRLS ARE DEPENDENT ON THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS". oh my...... I got irate by it. just cause all the girls that you've been with are dependent on you, not all will and ARE. example? living example? ME! I think, if there's one thing I'm proud of with myself, that would be I AM NOT A CLINGY GIRLFRIEND. and that I AM NOT THE JEALOUS kind! why?!!! because I know I can trust the guys I am with! i don't call anyone 24/7th, I even push them to go out. I do my own thing, I make things for me, I make my own decisions. I don't ask little things that there's no irrelevance to what we are. I AM THE BOSS OF ME! coz I know I can trust my man. ask all my exes, I barely had issues with trust when it comes to them! if there was an issue, it's them with me. Oh men. sorry but not all filipina girls are dependent on their significant others! that's one thing I hate is being dependent on my guy. I'm the independent kind. FYI, if you haven't notice, I have my own thing separate from whatsoever I have with my manfriend. I have my own set of friends, I have my own thing going on. we're together but separate. If there's one thing a person needs to know about me, this would be it: I don't like too much dependency, I walk like a boss, talk like a boss, do it like the boss, because I AM THE BOSS OF ME. i got my own thing. Like me or leave me. I won't push myself to you. And I'll tell you to get lost. blunt as a motherfcker.



"I want you but I don't need you. everything I have, best believe I bought it.

good deeds&blessings in disguise fluffy things.

me and manny (I'll call him manny. manfriend=manny) were fighting. So we talked in the car, and drove at the park so we would have a deep conversation thing. In the middle of the argument, we were already heating things up and getting all hurt with words and we were at the edge of killing and me abusing him. I was seriously going to break it off with him. When all of a sudden, two little stray dogs coming to us. They were stray because no one was at the park, just us and the dogs. So we took the dogs, and looked at their tags and tried calling the phone number on their collars. It took long hours to get a hold of the people. So while we were calling them, we looked at each other holding each dog, looked into each others eyes. With no words.............. we kissed.
THEN... after that, the dogs' owner picked up the phone and they said their worried sick about their little tick tack and musky. So we asked for thier adress and return their precious little cute dogs to their rightful owner.
It's funny how I said rightful owners. My heart's been thru alot. got kicked and pushed, got denied and everything. But when he took me, My heart never felt safe til I met him. I know I can trust him with my eyes close. And he won't hurt me like others did. He'll protect me and will always bring it back to the rightful owner--me.
Even though we constantly fight and get into arguments, we will be there for each other. He DESERVES my heart.

insensitive.

I have been told that I'm too insensitive. Specially towards other people's feelings towards me. Here's one brief and deep explanation why I am the way I am.

Before, I was not. I was too sensitive and "reciprocated" to what you were sending and giving me. But when I give too much, "they" started taking what I have given for granted. I was hurt. so bad, that I even thought of turning my back on everything. It hurts so badddddddddddddddd that I taught myself to toughen up. In the process of "toughening", my outer skin became so thick... that even a tiny bit of osmosis won't even come through. And now, I don't even know how to feel you. If there was love that left, I buried it under the deepest corner and prayed that it won't escape through and knock my wall down.

Insensitive. Now life's better. Hope it will be better for you and me.
Caring scarred me for life. I will care, but will not care if you don't.

songs to my manfriend TODAY!

coz i just can't seem to picture my day without him even though we almost killed each other today!!! fuck you babe, i can't live with out you! bitch, whatchu do to me? bitch bitch!! i love you!

coz he's my sugar daddie. yowp!

whatever you liii

niko: honiko this song is for u
niko: =)
niko: go to youtube
niko: watever u like
niko: from TI
mai: yeah rightt!
mai: hahaha
mai: that's funny baby
mai: really now..




ya got some hot wings?!

asdf

It's amazing how I find time to eat. sleep. talk. be gf. a student. a sister. cook. dance. do this survey. and all those thing i do in between, inspite of my oh so buys schedule. AND I LOVE IT. nothing gets better than being so accomplish and doing things that you love at the same time.

chao.

10 to 1 of My World


TEN HOW'S:

How did you get one of your scars?
oh you know, it's typical. everyday.

How did you celebrate your last birthday?
my friends and i ate, then my family went to vegas.

How are you feeling at this moment?
I'M GOOD.

How did your night go last night?
one of the amazing nights I have had so far this year. Manfriend treated me good.

How did you do in high school?
good.

How did you get the shirt you're wearing?
sister.


How often do you see ur best friend?
when I'm hungry.

How much money did you spend last month?
tons.

How old do you want to be when you get married?
26ish

How old will you be at your next birthday?
22

NINE WHAT'S:

Your mothers name?
maria bonita "bonnie" guevara tinio.

What did you do last weekend?
cuddle

What is the most important part of your life?
what: living life with no regrets
who: people that are responsible of me being me right now.


What would you rather be doing?
doing nothing and eating dark chocolates, and cuddling while getting a foot massage!

What did you last cry over?
I missed my appointment and i cried. coz, i was so pissed.

What always makes you feel better when you’re upset?
sleeping.

What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other?
TRUST.HONESTY.OPEN MINDEDNESS.

What are you worried about?
my school. well not worried, more like, excited/anxiousness.

What did you have for breakfast?
ribs.

EIGHT HAVE YOU’S:

Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend?
crush. not liiiikeee as inn LIKEEE i will still him like. NO.

Have you ever had your heartbroken?
once. but it was stupid, now i regret.

Have you ever been out of the country?
yes. 4-6 times i can't remember.

Have you ever done something outrageously dumb?
oh yeah. A. L. O. T.

Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend?
yes, been there done that so over it. your lost.

Have you ever had sex on the beach?
yes, WAIT, THE DRINK I MEAN. it's a cocktail. hello. anyone 21yrold should know that.

Have you ever dated someone younger than you?
nope, don't swing that wayyy.

Have you ever read an entire book in one day?
yessss. oh yess.

SEVEN WHO’S:

Who was the last person you saw?
uncle ef.

Who was the last person you texted?
my buuudddddddd, christine, my undercover buudddddd.

Who was the last person you hungout with?
christine with bryan.

Who was the last person to call you?
mannfriend<3

Who did you last hug?
manfriend<3 with a squeeze on the butt.

Who is the last person who texted you?
colleen.

Who was the las person you said "i love you" to?
manfriend<3 with a big fat kiss on the lips.

SIX WHERE’S:

Where does your best friend live?
bayyareaa.

Where did you last go?
sf, for a really nice elegant unique kwirky wedding. Dr. nate's.

Where did you last hang out?
my hood.

Where do you go to school?
SJSU. yeyiie.

Where is your favorite place to be?
BSA lounging area. food food food. so cheap!

Where did you sleep last night?
my bed.

FIVE DO’S/DOES:

Do you like someone right now?
always.

Do you think anyone likes you?
always. psshh. hah!

Do you ever wish you were someone else?
noooo...
celebrity sometimes.

Do you know the muffin man?
hahahaha. he's my next door neigbhor.

Does the future scare you?
yes....

FOUR WHY’S:

Why are you best friends with your best friend(s)?
Because they are real and there for me when I need them, and not need them. same feathers flocks togethers. waters and rices.

Why did you get a myspace?
peer pressurre.

Why did your parents give you the name you have?
marie - my mom.
donna - her bestfriend
lisa - coz she likes it.

Why are you doing this survey?
because Im taking a break from school things.

THREE IF’S:

If you could have one super power what would it be??
Ill be flash woman.

If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you?
sometimesss. idk. still contemplating about that.

If u were stranded on a deserted island & could bring 1 thing what would you bring?
the whole entire mall.

TWO WOULD-YOU-EVER’S:

Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you?
nopee. sorry buddy. too late.

Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love?
YES. i'm thinking about that actually. no foreals.

ONE LAST QUESTION

Are you happy with your life right now?

yes sir. happiest ever.

something only happens to me.

So before I sleep, its only 840pm, but I haven't had sleep because I couldn't sleep. I think I have insomia. tskk. well anyways, so today, at sjsu, I was sitting at those benches near the fountain, some random beezy sat next to me with her little baby and somewhat 3 year old boy. Damn, that boy was crazy. He went right in into the water, so the mom had to go for her. For some random thing, she handed me her baby so she could ran for her boy. Damn, I was like... uuuhhhh.......... excuse me... what am I going to do with this little "thing". So I was holding the baby, the baby by the way is less than a year. around 4 months. That lady sure can trust some poor college girl like me. If I did not have a heart, and that I'm seriously fucked up person, I would ran away with the kid and sell it, like that one case "madeliene" kid. But I'm a good person, so i was akwardly holding the baby and staring at it. after 2 minutes or so, the mom and boy came back. the boy was all wet and the baby started crying...FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.... I think the baby was hungry... soooo what did the mother do??? SHE PULLED HER SHIRT DOWN AND FLUNG AROUND HER BOOBS AND TITS AROUND SO SHE COULD FEED THE BABY. no joke!!! it was in public, and she just pulled her shirt and her breast showed! and check this out, while her shirt was down, her boobs were showing and she got something in the stroller while her boobs were flunging and slunging around! it was showing for good ten seconds. that's a lot of one mississippis. you could do 5 intersessions with that seconndddssss... people were walking by her too. and it was a busy crowd. I was seriously shocked and I couldn't believe my eyes, I was less than 5 feet from her, and people were shocked too. I SWEAR!! It was the funniest, scariest thing ever for me. imagine some boobies with big tits around you? dannggg... some experiences in my life..... huh?


THINGS LIKE THIS HAPPENS TO ME DAILY. how interesting my life is huh? stay tuned, maybe next time I'll talk about some penises flunging around. lol.